You Tube video

Below I thought I'd share a video I found on You Tube (you have to double click on it and it will bring you to You Tube to watch it). It's great for us parents in waiting as it illustrates the feelings a child has leaving the orphanage. It gets me thinking of how hard it will be if our little guy is very upset to leave the place he has known all his life while we will be so thrilled to finally have him in our arms. In thinking about it I think we will have to acknowledge the loss or grief that our child may be having despite all of our excitement. It is not easy to think of it this way...I want to picture our little one clinging to us with happy smiles, sharing the same joy we will have. Anyway...just some random thoughts. Not much new on the adoption front although in the past week I have received emails from two different couples in Minnesota also adopting from Russia AND who have been assigned to our region - Tver. One of the couples submitted their dossier shortly after we did so there is a good chance we will be traveling together. We are hoping to meet up with them next time we are near Minneapolis. It will be great to keep in contact with each other as we wait and hopefully as our sons grow.

International Adoption Workshop (intro)

We have no news on the adoption front but not a day goes by that were not thinking of our future son who is waiting for a family - below is a poem I found today:

KISSES IN THE WIND

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams. You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.

I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long. But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.

Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you. I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.

Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.

But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind. May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight. And let the angels bring the kisses that I send to you each night.
--- Unknown

busy, busy

I wish there was more to post on the adoption front. I did speak with our adoption consultant last week and she assured me that despite the slow down in our region they did not anticipate moving us regions. The hard thing for us to swallow is that our region may no longer be waiving the 10 day waiting period (for those of you not obsessed with the Russian adoption scene - there is a 10 day waiting period after you adopt your child that the judge may or may not choose to waive). In the past Tver has been a region which nearly always waived that extra 10 days however they have switched judges and this might not be the case anymore. The hardest part about that will be leaving our daughter for an EXTRA 10 days...I can't imagine how difficult that will be. Life outside of adoption has been busy. I have started my last semester of grad school and am back to a full work schedule. So I leave the house at 7am and do not return until 9pm most nights - with the exception of a quick occassional dinner. December 10th will be a happy day for me!!

Yeah PBS!

This Friday PBS will be airing the first in a two part series on "Arthur" in which Arthur's friend becomes a big brother when his parents adopt a little girl from China. The producers spent hours with families who have adopted. Yeah PBS! (For show times check out www.pbskidsgo.org/arthur )

IAD (Intl. Adoption Doctor) and other stuff

So we have done some searching lately for an international adoption doctor. Services seem to vary greatly from hiring a doctor to come to the orphanage to using an array of procedures to tell if the child has Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. We have decided to use the University of Minnesota's adoption clinic (http://www.med.umn.edu/peds/iac/home.html). They have a great repuatation and are easy access to us. I have also been in recent contact with a doctor there who is doing research on children under 3 adopted from Eastern European countries. We are not sure whether we will participate in that. We are glad to have made the decision about who to go with however do not yet know to what extent we will use them (for instance - we haven't decided if we will have the child examined for FAS features). Not a lot new on the adoption front - often people in Russia take vacation for most or all of August so we are hoping and praying things will pick back up in September. We are a little discouraged that our region has been very inactive. As Rachel said to me in an email earlier today, "this process is not for the faint of heart". So true!

In other news we have been keeping busy with many house projects...some planned and some not. We PLANNED on painting our kitchen cabinets, walls and living room and did complete this massive undertaking :). We DID NOT PLAN on our electricity in half the house to stop working and for the septic to give...long story short our very nice friends Kami and Chad (an electrician) came over and for the mere price of pizzas spent hours looking into our electrical problem. Well...we ended up finding a "secret room" attached to our closet which had a light dangling from it and burned some wires - we could have lost our whole house!! The septic is another story - the roots to our neighbors large tree have dug into and pierced a whole in our septic line - part of which is under the house!! So...needless to say most our labor day weekend has been spent digging! At least we had good weather! I am also getting preparing to go back to school...the next few months will be very busy for me as I work on my last semester of grad school :) and my workload heads into full force. The good thing about that is that when I am that busy time will seem less until we meet our son!

This weekend we attended a wedding and picnic put on by our regional coordinator for our agency. We had a great time meeting other parents-in-waiting and adoptive parents...there's something so therapeutic about sharing similar joys and struggles. It is a rush to listen to the travels of others going to meet their child(ren) for the first time knowing that this will soon be us. I felt so selfish complaining about the wait time to adopt our child when speaking with parents anticipating a three year wait for their child from China. Were looking forward to keeping in contact with other Minnesota adopting families. Some things we learned today: it can be 40 below 0 in January in Russia (drastic even for Northern Minnesotans), nearly everyone advises against taking your child with you to Russia (little Al will stay with gramma and grampa), to not be alarmed by the potential small size of our child and that we are not the only ones struggling with this waiting thing!

On the adoption front...things are quiet. Not a lot of news as we wait. I did talk to our consutant from St. Louis today. She stated that while they are no longer updating families where they are in line, she will notify us when we are second or third in line so we have a couple months to prepare. She felt our wait time was still around 10 months from April although she anticipated this would decrease as accredidiation should occur soon. While we would love to have our little guy home by Christmas it does not look like this will happen. We keep focusing on that more time will allow us to continue fundraising and time for me to complete my masters degree and thesis (this January - yeah!!). On another note, we had our fourth jewelry fundraising sale this weekend...it was very quiet where we were but we did well fundraising. We were able to visit with friends and relatives there and so appreciate all of our friends and family who came by to see us including my folks, Ryans dad, Donn, Shar and Cristrian, Laura and Jade and Mellissa and Khrystine - it was so great to see you all and we appreciate all of your support! So..I am taking the advice of friends and adding a guest book to the blog - so say hello or comment if you wish...this spot has been therapeutic for us and we are happy so many of you have signed on to follow our journey.

FAQ's

I decided to post answers to our most Frequently Asked Questions about our adoption...if you have more to ask, please feel free.

• Why Russia?

We decided on Russia after exploring an array of options. We truly felt a calling to the area. We have ansectors from the area and we are allowed to adopt infants (not true of all foreign adoptions).

• Have you met your child yet?

No. We will not meet him until our first trip.

• Will you get a picture?

Doubtful, most Russian adoptions do not give pictures to families however the region we are adopting from does do this occasionally.

• Do you have to go to Russia?

Yes, twice. The first trip is our "referral trip" where we will meet the child and accept or decline the referral. We will be able to send medical reports back to the University of MN adoption clinic for review prior to our acceptance.

• Did you consider adopting from the U.S.?

Not so much. We really saw this as an opportunity to add to our family while also helping a child who is in need of a home.

• How old will he be?

We have requested a boy between the ages of 6 months (the youngest you can adopt from Russia) to 18 months.

Shirts and fundraising...

These shirts are too cute (found at http://www.adoptionmama.com/) - a fellow blogger talked about the site and it's attentiveness to adoption issues! The first shirt says "Yes, I am still adopting. No, I haven't heard anything yet". The second shirt is difficult to read but states "WARNING: I am in love with a child I haven't met yet. I am in the process of adoption. I am subject to cry at any moment. Please bear with me until my referral comes".

On another note...we had our third fundraising sale this weekend. It was ok...I guess you take the good with the bad. We met very nice people and many who took our card to look at our blog here - if you did - thank you so much for your support!! So...here I go - this is my therapeutic venting for the day - if someone says hi to you - say hi back!!! UGH! I cannot believe the amount of people that do not say "hi" when spoken to OR the amount of people that feel it is okay to say "don't you know there are kids in the US?" My response, "Yes, I am aware of that. We are so fortunate to live in a country though where there is not a high need for adoption of infants while in Russia 700,000 children wait in orphanages". Still...I am sure people can hardly hear me as I'm grinding my teeth in frustration. Yet - there are others who are so supportive - people who stop to ask about the process or stop to introduce me to their adopted child....no amount of sales can make up for moments like that. The amount of love and support from strangers to not was so much more when I was pregnant than it is now. So this is my soapbox (for today): if you know someone who is adopting - show her just as much excitement and joy as you would if you saw a big round belly on her...she needs and deserves that!

Tag - I'm it!!

I was tagged by Rachel with this questionnaire - so here we go!!

5 things I was doing 10 years ago:
1. Enjoying my first year in Northern MN
2. Driving a Volkswagen jetta
3. Working on my social work and education degrees
4. Living in a cute little apt. overlooking the lake and university
5. Working in residential treatment

5 snacks I enjoy:
1. Coffee!!
2. Pizza - any kind, any time
3. Spinach dip
4. Pringles
5. Mocha ice cream


5 things I would do if I were a Millionaire
1. Pay off our debt - then check to see if there was anything left :)
2. Adopt a couple more little guys
3. Pay off the debt of our friends and family
4. Help the AIDS foundation in Africa
5. Help others adopt orphans around the world


5 bad habits:
1. Talking too fast when I'm nervous
2. Eating when I'm stressed
3. Over worrying
4. Pushing the snooze - for 30-45 minutes!
5. Eating before bed

5 things I like to do:
1. Swim
2. Hike
3. Cross country ski
4. Go to the amusement park or zoo with Allie
5. Drink coffee by the lake with a good friend

5 things I would never wear again:
1. A two piece that does not cover my tummy
2. Rolled jeans (except on a dare - remember Betsy?)
3. Super high curled bangs
4. Any type of perm (not a good look for me)
5. Any multi colored neon items

Hmmm....who's the lucky one to get tagged....I'm going to pass this on to my fellow Tver adoptee Carrie!! Enjoy!

Catching up...

It has been a little while - what have we been doing? A lot! We returned late yesterday after a whirlwind of events. We left suddenly after my Grandmother passed away. We traveled to Minneapolis to help with funeral arrangements and be with family. It was a hard week. My Grandmother was full of life and spirit and speaking at her funeral was one of the hardest things I've ever done. She had been so excited about our adoption and I am sad our little man will not have the pleasure of knowing her. Immediately after the funeral we headed North for a jewelry fundraiser. We have had great increase in our jewelry sales and are considering starting a website just dedicated to selling it...I even sold to a couple of people who are looking to sell it in their stores / boutiques!! We then headed further North for some much needed relaxation time. I am sure those of you in this waiting stage can relate to the feeling that the adoption never really leaves your mind...thinking of our son who we have not yet met sitting in an orphanage is very, very difficult sometimes. Getting back to reality is always hard...Ryan continues to search for employment and time will tell whether we will remain in our home. I was hoping to hear news about our agencies accreditation but no word yet. It also does not appear that things in our region are moving along very swiftly as there have not been any referrals there for quite a while therefore we may inquire about switching regions if this does not pick up after summer months. I am posting a pic from our trip...Allison had a blast up North - she caught her first fish, paddled her first canoe and ate way more raspberries than she could count. A special thanks to Tom, Pat and Patty who were very hospitable while we stayed with them!!

A little brother?!?

Common questions in our house right now are, "Go get brother now?" and "I go Russia too?" So...how do you explain the Russian adoption process to a 2.5 year old who has difficulty waiting 30 seconds for her sippy cup?!? We try to avoid detailed conversation around her but she is really curious and very excited to say the least. She is loving picking out the little fish we are putting in his room and when we see boy clothes she begs to "get if for brother". We continue to tell her it will be a "long time" (as we pray it won't) but then again I told her it will also be a "long time" before her friend's birthday party next weekend. Poor thing! My mom sent this adorable t-shirt in the mail today - she loves it! We can hardly wait to see the interactions between the two of them!

Gratitude, Gratitude, Gratitude...

"What I know for sure is that what you give comes back to you"
...Oprah Winfrey

So...I sent out a small email and made a call or two in regards to our adoption fundraiser rummage sale. We were floored and humbled by the responses - we received donations from everything from kids clothing to an elliptical machine!! We raised over $500 to aid our adoption during our rummage sale yesterday!

We want to single out appreciation to those who donated the hall we used and also to Kim, Paula, Jan and Shaylee for their generous donations! Thank you!

Clarification about Russian adoption...

On a chat group I belong to for families adopting from Russia a clarification was posted to all of the recent discussion about Russian adoption. As the media has increased their recent coverage as accreditation begins, questions have arisen from others around us about our own adoption. (By the way - if your interested, I just entered a new link to one of our favorite sites called "WOW Russia"). This is what the poster stated:

"Folk, just to clarify something. Russia has never been closed to adoptions,either to US or other nationalities. Adoptions have continued unabated,although at lower levels for US families, all along. It is also worth mentioning that although Mr Putin is doing his best to increase adoption rates in Russia, because of the high numbers of children available and the culture prevailing there.... And now for another myth which needs to be killed off: the individuals 'on the ground', orphanage staff, doctors, social services, are extremely supportive of international adopters - we were asked repeatedly during our visit if we knew other families we could talk to! - they have the same goals we do - get the kids into stable, loving homes as soon as possible. What gets in the way is this huge bureaucracy which, while initially built to protect the children,has grown out of proportion and is staffed by individuals who are so far removed from the front line they consider this just paperwork. We have experienced acts of extreme kindness and support in Russia.... I am pleased to see some of the blockers removed which will allow more US families to adopt. I wish you all well in this fabulous life journey we are undertaking."

Congrats to My Hubby!!

Why congrats you may ask...on Wednesday evening Ryan officially graduated from his six week intensive police officer skills training (which he started immediately following his lay off). The pic is from his graduation ceremony we were able to attend. I haven't posted much on this mainly because I'm a little paranoid about throwing out that I'm alone with a 2-year-old for all to see. Allison is very happy to be with her daddy and we are super proud of him!

Accredidation & Fundraising Stuff...

So...I have been waiting a little bit to post - truthfully because I have been hoping for better news. The great news is that 8 agencies have been accredited recently (on July 4th) the not so great news is that our agency was not amongst them. We are confident however that it will not be long before our agency receives this. In the meantime we have been busy working toward funding our adoption. So far we have worked on organizing an adoption fundraiser garage sale, sold over $300.00 worth of items on ebay, begun sales of bracelets and even sold a vehicle....Ryan's red ranger. That's right - the 1989 red Ford Ranger Ryan was known for has been sold.

The demand and appreciation for the bracelets has been so great that we decided to began selling them at art and craft fairs and we have also ordered a large quantity of necklaces and earrings to match. It was a tuff decision as a lot of start up money was needed. So far we have booked the venues below - so for our friends and family (or others in the adoption world) scattered throughout Minnesota - come see us!

July 21: Walker, MN
July 27 - 29: Two Harbors, MN
August 11-12: St. Cloud, MN
November 2-3: St. Cloud, MN
November 30 - Dec. 2: Duluth, MN

I wanted to shout out thanks to two good friends - to Betsy for helping by selling our bracelets (very successfully!) at her place of employment and to Jess for giving us some very cute and gently used little boy clothes!

Godspeed - Dixie Chicks

Fundraising

For all of you at least a little familiar with international adoption you are aware of the incredible costs. As we now wait and pray for accreditation and to receive our referral we are struggling to find ways to support our adoption. Most of you are aware that recently the nonprofit agency we both work for was forced to close. Fortunately Amy's position is one of three that will remain as she's contracted to work in the schools however Ryan was officially laid off this week. Having paid for 1/3 of our costs to this point and knowing that a little boy waits for us (and us for him)we are keeping on. We would love to hear any ideas from our creative family and friends as well as suggestions from the many new friends we have met in this process. So....if you have a suggestion please leave it in our comments and we'll keep track of them. One thing we have decided to do is to sell bracelets...hence the bracelet picture and donation button to your left. We just started our counter below and found we got over 50 hits on our blog in one day! Glad to know we are so interesting :) so we figured at that rate we could actually fund our adoption on these bracelets...so my wonderful husband has agreed to shave his head if we sell 2,000 bracelets! Bald is beautiful and I promise to post pics here. Other things we have done thus far include:

*Applying for adoption grants (no luck yet)
*Took out a loan against our home (helpful but still short $20,000)
*Selling any item we could possibly do without on ebay
*Adoption bracelets

No news is not always good news...

I spoke with our adoption consultant in St. Louis today. It all boils down to no real new news. It seems everyone anticipates re-accrediation to happen with Russia soon however NO agencies have it right now. Our expected wait time if accrediation does not happen soon is 10-12 months from the time we submitted our dossier until when we actually bring our little guy home. So - since we sent our dossier in around the first of May we believe a very approximate time frame for our first trip will be around December - March with our final trip 2-3 months following that. She also stated that it is likely that our 500 - 700 page dossier is now completed being translated however we will not be contacted by Russia now until we get "the call" for our referral. We of course are praying for accrediation to happen soon - not only for our sake but for the good of all the children and families who are having to wait this out. So while I do not right now like the phrase "no news is good news", I do have greater appreciation for the statment, "patience is a virtue".

Amy